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Auckland, North Island, New Zealand
Wine tour operator, wine writer and lapsed physiotherapist. "Nature abhors a vacuum. I personally hate dusting."

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Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Some Bastard ...

OK - yesterday I had 4 clients in my vehicle.  All very fine till we got to lunch.

Front seat passengers when exiting, remarked on a thin string of blue stuff attached to their wine purchase.  I investigated.  The bright aqua blue gunk was in fact chewing gum.  Not only was it stuck to their wine carton, it was also firmly attached to the vehicle nylon carpet in a sticky blob about half an inch square.

SOME BASTARD (gender neutral) not only took a wine tour, but also had the mindlessness to CHEW GUM on a wine tour.  For the unwashed - this is akin to farting in the Sistine Chapel, or saying the N word near the President of the USA.  Not only did they chew said offensive oral garbage, but they somehow managed to drop it on the carpet ... without noticing...or owning up to it if they did notice. BASTARD!!!

So - I'm reduced to Googling E-How.com for the best advice as to how to remove bright aqua blue chewing gum from carpet.  They suggest: place an ice pack on the gum for 5 minutes.  This will freeze the gum solid, making it easier to remove in chunks.  Any residue may be cleaned off with Carbon Tetrachloride (dry cleaning fluid). 

I did the ice trick - moderately successful, but still gum entrapped in the carpet fibres.  I have no Carbon Tetrachloride.  So I had a glass of Pinot Gris followed by three glasses of Chardonnay. (These were administered to myself and not the carpet, I might add.)   Then I decided to leave it till the morrow - whence I will try Bug 'n' Tar Remover - or methylated spirits or mineral turpentine.

BUT ... Shame On You -  GUM BASTARD!  May you choke on your gum.  May any Heimlich manouvre do nothing more than pop wax out of your ears, and may all your cellared wine be cork tainted by horrendous amounts of  trichloroanisole. 

 Phil normally LOVES running wine tours around Auckland NZ

2 comments:

  1. Dude - that's incredible. Do you have any suspects?

    Aside from the obvious wine/gum issue (ugh) - a grownup? Grinding gum into a carpet? Unreal.

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  2. I should have locked the doors and said, There has been a crime committed. 'Nobody leave the vehicle!'

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